It took me years of heartbreak and loss to figure this simple formula out……express your feeling of anger WITH WORDS and tell people why you’re upset. Tell them you don’t want to be upset.
I had an awful temper problem and I would just blow up and the cost to me was incredible.
So I learned to explain my anger and not to act on it, I try to explain it in a reasonable, non-threatening manner.
Do that and watch how positive the path to an open, calm solution will arrive.