John William Tuohy lives in Washington DC

Don't worry...be happy


Let us if we must have great actions make our own so. All action is of infinite elasticity and the least admits of being inflated with celestial air until it eclipses the sun and moon.

300 quotes from Emerson
To view more Emerson quotes or read a life background on Emerson please visit the books blog spot. We update the blog bi-monthly  emersonsaidit.blogspot.com

What Love is…..
I love the melodies in the Old Testament, how preachers highlight them when they read from the Scripture. But I was influenced forever by the New Testament. I love the Beatitudes, informing us that the meek shall inherit the earth. Maya Angelou

To: nycplaywrights_group@googlegroups.com  
Greetings NYCPlaywrights

“Poetry, plays, novels, music, they are the cry of the human spirit trying to understand itself and make sense of our world.” L.M. Elliott

Hudson Warehouse: Henry IV Part I
Sunday, June 21, 2015
6:30 p.m.–8:30 p.m.
This event repeats every week on Sunday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday between 6/4/2015 and 6/28/2015.
Henry IV, Part 1 depicts a span of history that begins with Hotspur's battle at Homildon in Northumberland against the Douglas late in 1402, and ends with the defeat of the rebels at Shrewsbury in the middle of 1403.
Soldiers' and Sailors' Monument in Riverside Park
West 89th Street and Riverside Drive
Location Details: North Patio
Cost: Free 
Contact Email




Seeking new, full-length ensemble plays for young actors with casts of 7-10 roles that have a majority of female characters or gender neutral characters. One play or more may be selected for a student production (this is a curricular project for full-time acting students). Plays must be new, unproduced works and require minimal set, props, costumes.
We are currently accepting submissions for the 2016-17 Reva Shiner Comedy Award
"Full-length" plays will have a complete running time of between 1 hour 15 minutes (75 minutes) to 2 hours 15 minutes (135 minutes).
Plays submitted must be unpublished at the time of submission. Plays that have received developmental readings, workshop productions, or productions at small theatre companies are acceptable. No scripts with previous productions at major regional theaters will be accepted. Once entered, subsequent activity does not change the acceptability of the script.
Each submission must include a synopsis (1 page or less) including the cast size. A separate page should include a brief bio of the playwright, and production/development history if applicable.
All For One Theater, an NYC based solo theater production company, is now accepting submissions for their Works-in-Progress program.

All For One’s Works In Progress series provides an outlet for solo shows in progress to receive outside help in their development. AFO will help connect solo show artists with directors and other collaborators as needed to help develop their work and present a reading in front of an audience, AFO community members, and industry professionals to receive feedback.

*** FOR MORE INFORMATION on these and other opportunities see the web site at http://www.nycplaywrights.org ***

Time Out NY: The complete guide to Shakespeare in the Park in NYC
Every summer, the Public Theater produces a beloved New York democratic tradition: Shakespeare in the Park, presented for free at the open-air Delacorte Theater in Central Park. There’s nothing quite like hearing the Bard’s immortal words performed outdoors, with a backdrop of natural splendor and the Belvedere Castle looming in the background like the world’s most impressive set decoration. But Shakespeare in the Park’s popularity means that tickets aren’t easy to come by. Only the most perseverant will be able to secure seats. Here’s our guide to navigating the system.

What is Shakespeare in the Park?
Created by the late Joseph Papp in 1962, the Public Theater's series offers free, large-scale productions of works by William Shakespeare (as well as the occasional musical or non-Shakespearean drama). The productions often feature some of the most talented actors of our day. Past casts have included including Meryl Streep, Kevin Kline, Al Pacino, Blythe Danner, Philip Seymour Hoffman, George C. Scott and Denzel Washington.

Visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/nycplaywrights_group.

New Yorkers

Edward Field
Edward Field (born June 7, 1924) is a poet and author. Field was born in Brooklyn, New York, and grew up in Lynbrook, Long Island, New York, where he played cello in the Field Family Trio, which had a weekly radio program on WGBB Freeport. He served in World War II in the 8th Air Force as a navigator in heavy bombers, and flew 25 missions over Germany. He began writing poetry during World War II, after a Red Cross worker handed him an anthology of poetry. In 1963 his book Stand Up, Friend, With Me was awarded the prestigious Lamont Poetry Prize and was published. In 1992, he received a Lambda Award for Counting Myself Lucky, Selected Poems 1963-1992. Other honors include the Shelley Memorial Award, a Rome Prize, and an Academy Award for the documentary film To Be Alive, for which he wrote the narration. He received the Bill Whitehead Award for Lifetime Achievement from Publishing Triangle in 2005.

Everywhere else in the country, if someone asks,
How are you? you are required to answer,
like a phrase book, Fine, and you?

Only in New York can you say, Not so good, or even,
Rotten, and launch into your miseries and symptoms,
then yawn and look bored when they interrupt
to go into the usual endless detail about their own.

Nodding mechanically, you look at your watch.
Look, angel, I’ve got to run, I’m late for my…uh…
uh…analyst. But let’s definitely
get together soon.

In just as sincere a voice as yours,
they come back with, Definitely!
and both of you know what that means,

Best gift for fathers would be paid family leave

Janet Walsh

For $45, you can get some cool Father’s Day gifts: a grilling set, a Swiss army knife and even some baby carriers. But consider this: for 45 cents per week, New York fathers could have something far more precious — paid family leave.
A bill to establish a state paid family leave insurance program made headway in New York this year. This bill would provide workers in New York state with up to 12 weeks of paid leave per year to bond with a new child, care for a seriously ill family member or address certain issues arising from military service. If this program is adopted, workers would receive two-thirds of their average weekly wage while on leave, up to a cap. The benefit would be financed solely through employee payroll deductions of up to 45 cents per week.
The U.S. is an outlier on this issue. A 2014 International Labor Organization report found that out of 185 countries, only the United States and Papua New Guinea lack paid leave for new mothers under law. Paid paternity leave for fathers is also on the rise, with at least 71 countries guaranteeing it.
The U.S. Family and Medical Leave Act enables workers with new children or family members with serious medical conditions to take unpaid leave, but about 40 percent of the workforce is not covered. There is no national law on paid family leave.
Despite this federal gap, states are starting to craft their own paid family leave insurance programs, with great success. California, New Jersey, and Rhode Island now have paid family leave programs, funded by small worker payroll contributions. A few states, including New York, offer temporary disability insurance programs.
In states without such programs, paid family leave is up to the whim of employers. Only 12 percent of U.S. private industry workers have paid family leave benefits.
Research shows that family leave insurance is good for employers, the economy, public health and equality. In a 2011 survey on the California program, most employers reported that paid family leave had a positive effect or no noticeable effect on productivity, profitability, turnover and employee morale.
In sum, if you’re looking for a good gift for Father’s Day, start by backing paid family leave.
Janet Walsh is deputy women’s rights director at Human Rights Watch and author of “Failing its Families: Lack of Paid Leave and Work-Family Supports in the US.”
Good for families and businesses

'Death and Mr. Pickwick' a novel rich enough for Dickens to steal

By Mike Fischer, Special to the Journal Sentinel
Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

Death and Mr. Pickwick. By Stephen Jarvis. Farrar, Straus and Giroux. 816 pages. $30.

How can I convince you to lose yourself in first-time novelist Stephen Jarvis' magnificent, 816-page "Death and Mr. Pickwick"?
Perhaps by reminding you that "The Pickwick Papers" — the greatest phenomenon in literary history and, during its first century, the world's best known book after the Bible — was an equally big book by another rookie novelist named Charles Dickens?
If, that is, Dickens really deserves being remembered as the creator of the legendary Samuel Pickwick, whose famous image — round and bespectacled head, big belly, black gaiters — is even recognized by those who have never read the book describing his picaresque travels around England.
Calling Dickens' authorial claim "the greatest literary hoax in history," Jarvis weaves a staggering amount of research into a gripping, fictionalized presentation of his emphatically non-fictional argument: Dickens stole both the concept as well as various scenes and characters in "Pickwick" — including the fat man himself and his three companions — from Robert Seymour, the caricaturist who illustrated this serialized novel's first two issues.
When the young and relatively unknown Dickens was approached about providing text to accompany Seymour's illustrations, Seymour was a famous caricaturist — we'd say cartoonist — drawing every third political caricature in Britain, along with hundreds of illustrations satirizing everything from Shakespeare to sporting life.
Three days after the only known meeting of Seymour and Dickens — between publication of the first and second parts of "Pickwick" in April 1836 — Seymour shot and killed himself.
Examining Seymour's surviving artwork and life while poking holes in the shifting and contradictory accounts by Dickens and his allies of how "Pickwick" began, Jarvis leaves little doubt in my mind that for all Dickens' undeniable genius — and I'm on record calling him the "greatest English novelist" — Seymour had much more to do with "Pickwick" than Dickens ever admitted.
Watching Jarvis make his compelling case is reason enough to read "Death and Mr. Pickwick." But that account doesn't begin to describe this novel's breathtaking shape and scope.
Much like Mr. Pickwick and his book, that shape is round, full and apt to wander off on long tangents; if you're looking for a tight story, this novel isn't for you.
Many of those tangents involve the real-life sources for the interpolated tales in "The Pickwick Papers" itself. One illustrative example: The jarring story of a pantomime who drinks himself to death is reborn in Jarvis' novel as the slightly fictionalized story of Joseph Grimaldi and his alcoholic son, both famous clowns in the early nineteenth century.
That story is in turn entwined with Seymour and Dickens' immersion in the same period's vibrant culture, featuring a huge cast of colorful characters — from bootblacks to philandering prime ministers — worthy of any Dickens novel.
Jarvis devotes particular attention to the publishing business, packing his account with real-life cameos involving printers, woodcutters and engravers as well as publishers, editors, writers and illustrators, at a time when London teemed with stores selling books and magazines — and when people eagerly queued up for the latest installment of "Pickwick" as it was released each month.
In a novel that often mirrors "The Pickwick Papers" while expressly invoking Borges' "Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote," all of this comes our way through discussions between two contemporary men: an older one who has spent his life amassing a trove of Pickwickian material and a narrator, "employed to produce the work which I lay before you now."
Unlike Dickens' treatment of the ill-fated Seymour, this younger writer pays continual homage to his companion. And like "The Pickwick Papers," they both pay homage to a vanished age of eccentrics — extending back through the Age of Johnson to Cervantes — when neither the novel nor life were as moralistic, rule-bound or plot-driven as they would become.
"It is the lie of novels," our narrator tells us toward the end of this wild ride, "to pretend that life has plot. The truth of life is like 'Pickwick': that one thing just follows another." In this exhilarating novel — so boldly backward that it's actually forward — Jarvis stakes a winning claim that we need more novels like it.

The Pickwick Papers

For a free copy of The Pickwwick Papers go to this site

The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club (also known as The Pickwick Papers) is Charles Dickens's first novel. He was asked to contribute to the project as an up-and-coming writer following the success of Sketches by Boz, published in 1836 (most of Dickens' novels were issued in shilling instalments before being published as complete volumes). Dickens (still writing under the pseudonym of Boz) increasingly took over the unsuccessful monthly publication after the original illustrator Robert Seymour had committed suicide.

Written for publication as a serial, The Pickwick Papers is a sequence of loosely-related adventures. The action is given as occurring 1827–8, though critics have noted some seeming anachronisms. It has been stated that Dickens satirized the case of George Norton suing Lord Melbourne in The Pickwick Papers.

The novel's main character, Samuel Pickwick, Esquire, is a kind and wealthy old gentleman, and the founder and perpetual president of the Pickwick Club. To extend his researches into the quaint and curious phenomena of life, he suggests that he and three other "Pickwickians" (Mr Nathaniel Winkle, Mr Augustus Snodgrass, and Mr Tracy Tupman) should make journeys to places remote from London and report on their findings to the other members of the club.

 Their travels throughout the English countryside by coach provide the chief theme of the novel. A distinctive and valuable feature of the work is the generally accurate description of the old coaching inns of England

Its main literary value and appeal is formed by its numerous memorable characters. Each character in The Pickwick Papers, as in many other Dickens novels, is drawn comically, often with exaggerated personality traits. Alfred Jingle, who joins the cast in chapter two, provides an aura of comic villainy.

His devious tricks repeatedly land the Pickwickians in trouble. These include Jingle's nearly-successful attempted elopement with the spinster Rachael Wardle of Dingley Dell manor, misadventures with Dr Slammer, and others.
Further humour is provided when the comic cockney Sam Weller makes his advent in chapter 10 of the novel. First seen working at the White Hart Inn in The Borough, Weller is taken on by Mr Pickwick as a personal servant and companion on his travels and provides his own oblique ongoing narrative on the proceedings. The relationship between the idealistic and unworldly Pickwick and the astute cockney Weller has been likened to that between Don Quixote and Sancho Panza.
Other notable adventures include Mr Pickwick's attempts to defend a lawsuit brought by his landlady, Mrs Bardell, who (through an apparent misunderstanding on her part) is suing him for breach of promise.
Another is Mr Pickwick's incarceration at Fleet Prison for his stubborn refusal to pay the compensation to her — because he doesn't want to give a penny to Mrs Bardell's lawyers, the unscrupulous firm of Messrs. Dodson and Fogg. The generally humorous tone is here briefly replaced by biting social satire (including satire of the legal establishment). This foreshadows major themes in Dickens's later books.

Central characters

Sam Weller and his father Tony Weller (The Valentine)Samuel Pickwick — the main protagonist and founder of the Pickwick Club. Following his description in the text, Pickwick is usually portrayed by illustrators as a round-faced, clean-shaven, portly gentleman wearing spectacles.

Nathaniel Winkle — a young friend of Pickwick's and his travelling companion; he considers himself a sportsman, though he turns out to be dangerously inept when handling horses and guns.

Augustus Snodgrass — another young friend and companion; he considers himself a poet, though there is no mention of any of his own poetry in the novel.

Tracy Tupman — the third travelling companion, a fat and elderly man who nevertheless considers himself a romantic lover.

Sam Weller — Mr Pickwick's valet, and a source of idiosyncratic proverbs and advice.

Tony Weller — Sam's father, a loquacious coachman.

Alfred Jingle — a strolling actor and charlatan, noted for telling bizarre anecdotes in a distinctively extravagant, disjointed style.

Supporting characters
Joe — the "fat boy" who consumes great quantities of food and constantly falls asleep in any situation at any time of day; Joe's sleep problem is the origin of the medical term Pickwickian syndrome which ultimately led to the subsequent description of Obesity hypoventilation syndrome.
Job Trotter — Mr Jingle's wily servant, whose true slyness is only ever seen in the first few lines of a scene, before he adopts his usual pretence of meekness.
Mr Wardle — owner of a farm in Dingley Dell. Mr Pickwick's friend, they meet at the military review in Rochester. Joe is his servant.
Rachael Wardle — the spinster aunt who tries in vain to elope with the unscrupulous Jingle.
Mr Perker — an attorney of Mr Wardle, and later of Mr Pickwick.
Mary — "a well-shaped female servant" and Sam Weller's "Valentine".
Mrs Martha Bardell — Mr Pickwick's widowed landlady who brings a case against him for breach of promise.
Emily Wardle — one of Mr Wardle's daughters, very fond of Mr Snodgrass.
Arabella Allen — a friend of Emily Wardle and sister of Ben Allen. She later elopes with Mr. Winkle and marries him.
Benjamin "Ben" Allen — Arabella's brother, a dissipated medical student.
Robert "Bob" Sawyer — Ben Allen's friend and fellow student.
Mr Serjeant Buzfuz — Mrs Bardell's lawyer in legal dealings with Mr Pickwick.

I am not a fan of public politics and I’m actually a fairly conservative person but Sanders is the only guy out their in the Presidential candidates field who is saying what needs to be said and is focusing on the things that need to be done. 

7 Things Bernie Sanders is Saying on the Campaign Trail
Kate Scanlon
Here are seven positions Sanders has taken on the campaign trail.

1. During a campaign stop at Drake University in Des Moines, Iowa, on June 12, Sanders told the crowd he wanted “to talk about what real family values are.”
“My Republican colleagues talk a lot about quote-unquote ‘family values,’” Sanders said. “What they mean is opposition to a woman’s right to choose, opposition to women getting contraception and strong opposition to gay rights. And on all of those issues I strongly disagree.”

2. During that same stop in Iowa, Sanders expressed support for mandatory paid family leave.
“Let me be very clear. It is not a family value to force the mother of a newborn baby to go back to work a few days after she gives birth because she doesn’t have the money to stay home and bond with her baby. That is not a family value,” Sanders said. “That is an insult to everything that I know about what family is about.”

3. At a town meeting in Keene, N.H., on June 6, Sanders told the crowd he wants to address the “growing gap in wealth” and “income inequality” in the United States.
“We live in a nation which is the wealthiest nation in the history of the world but almost all of that wealth rests in the hands of a handful of billionaires and that is something that has got to change,” he said. “The issue of wealth and income inequality is the great moral issue of our time. It is the great economic issue of our time, it is the great political issue of the time and we are going to address it.”

4. Sanders wants to eliminate tuition at public universities.
“As president, I will fight to make tuition in public colleges and universities free, as well as substantially lower interest rates on student loans,” Sanders said at his campaign launch in Burlington, Vermont, on May 26.

5. Sanders also said at his campaign launch that he wants to raise the minimum wage.
“The current federal minimum wage of $7.25 an hour is a starvation wage and must be raised. The minimum wage must become a living wage—which means raising it to $15 an hour over the next few years—which is exactly what Los Angeles recently did—and I applaud them for doing that. Our goal as a nation must be to ensure that no full-time worker lives in poverty,” Sanders said.

6. He wants to “establish pay equity for women workers.”
“It’s unconscionable that women earn 78 cents on the dollar compared to men who perform the same work,” Sanders said at his campaign launch.

7. He wants a single-payer health care system.
“The United States remains the only major country on earth that does not guarantee health care for all as a right. Despite the modest gains of the Affordable Care Act, 35 million Americans continue to lack health insurance and many more are under-insured,” Sanders said at his campaign launch.

Kate Scanlon is a news reporter for The Daily Signal and graduate of The Heritage Foundation's Young Leaders Program.

Ontario company hires 'happiness engineers' for employees
Amy Legate-Wolfe, CTVNews.ca
An Ontario video game company has recently hired "happiness engineers" dedicated to doing just about anything to keep employees happy.
Big Viking Games in London, Ont., hired the "engineers" to create a low-stress work environment in a high-stress industry.
The company settled on Jaime Pearse for one position, who couldn’t believe her luck.
"Happiness engineer is the best title in the world. I always want to engineer happiness," Pearse told CTV London.
Their arsenal of happiness includes daily catered lunches, a soft-serve ice cream machine, and even puppies.
"It's hard to be sad when you’re surrounded by so many great things," said human resources manager, Ana Ivanic.
That's exactly what Albert Lai, co-founder of Big Viking Games, was aiming for.
Lai believes the company has created a work environment everyone will want to be a part of. He then hopes it will attract the best people for every position in the company. Those people will then design the best products, and create more profits.
His theory seems to be proving itself. In April, the company was named one of the top 10 medium business employers in Canada by the Great Places to Work Institute. This year it was also named one of Canada's top employers for young people by Top Employer Magazine.
For employers who feel they don’t have the funds to create such an extravagantly stress-free work environment, Lai guarantees a return on the investment from the employees they hire.
"Can you afford not to do it, and be successful? We cannot afford to have anything less but stellar people working with us."

“Hope can be a powerful force. Maybe there’s no actual magic in it, but when you know what you hope for most and hold it like a light within you, you can make things happen, almost like magic.” Laini Taylor, Daughter of Smoke & Bone

From Othello
(Othello speaks)
Visit our Shakespeare Blog at the address below

It is the cause, it is the cause, my soul, -
Let me not name it to you, you chaste stars! -
It is the cause. Yet I’ll not shed her blood;
Nor scar that whiter skin of hers than snow,
And smooth as monumental alabaster.
Yet she must die, else she’ll betray more men.
Put out the light, and then put out the light:
If I quench thee, thou flaming minister,
I can again thy former light restore,
Should I repent me: but once put out thy light,
Thou cunning’st pattern of excelling nature,
I know not where is that Promethean heat
That can thy light relume. When I have pluck’d the rose,
I cannot give it vital growth again.
It must needs wither: I’ll smell it on the tree.
Ah balmy breath, that dost almost persuade
Justice to break her sword! One more, one more.
Be thus when thou art dead, and I will kill thee,
And love thee after. One more, and this the last:
So sweet was ne’er so fatal. I must weep,
But they are cruel tears: this sorrow’s heavenly;
It strikes where it doth love.

I’m trying to teach myself Spanish and this is what I learned today……..

Quemar (keh-mahr') to burn
1.         Cada vez que intento hacer arroz con gandules, quemo el arroz.
Every time I try to make rice with pigeon peas, I burn the rice.


Parse audio pron   \PARSS\ To resolve (as a sentence) into component parts of speech and describe them grammatically b: To describe grammatically by stating the part of speech and explaining the inflection and syntactical relationships 2: To examine in a minute way: analyze critically. Parse comes from the first element of the Latin term for "part of speech," pars orationis. It's an old word that has been used in the schoolroom since at least the student days of King Edward VI of England (1537-1553).

Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.”


Compiled by

John William Tuohy

Facebook Updates

I wish my money would have sex in my wallet and multiply

Without nipples, breasts would be pointless

Yesterday I had a headache, got rid of it while drinking a bottle of wine and today I have even a bigger headache...Irony

Jesus Mite Of Walked On Water. But Steven Hawking Runs On Batterys ;]

Nobody is perfect,I am nobody,therefore I'm a perfect.

When pulled over by the police and asked if you know why you were pulled over. The correct response is not, "How long have you been following me?" True story, he let me go, and laughed.

I got a degree in psychology to better understand the women I put in therapy.

Woohoo... I still fit in the same pants from high school, I look like the Incredible Hulk after he changes, but WOOHHOOO!

Im happy. I wanna jump in a cab yell at the driver, " LOSE THE COPS AND I'LL GIVE YOU $200, GO, GO, GO".

the cops pulled me over and tried to give me a speeding ticket... i told him officer im chasing my dream

I've tried driving without texting, eating or gettin baked but it was so boring I fell asleep at the wheel. wow...Thanks, Oprah.

I mustache you a question, but I'll shave it for later.

I have an oven with a 'stop time' button. It's probably meant to be 'stop timer' but I don't touch it, just in case.

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice Doggie.." until you get hold of a rock in your hand...

To wrongs don't make a right, but two rights make a u-turn.

I've said no to alcohol for years but it still won't listen.

Some people turn to God. Me? I turn to vodka. Im still guided by a spirit.

Remember: some days yo are the pigeon, some days you are the statue.

Susan is going to make her own brand of beer called Responsibly. I'd get free advertising from competitors - "Please drink Responsibly".

decided to burn lots of calories today so I set fire to a fat kid.

Dont you wonder why people look back at the same spot when they trip over it? As if the sidewalk is going to talk back/laugh at them.

A guy knocked on my door today asking for a donation for the local primary school's swimming pool. I went away and came back with a cup of water... Is that wrong?

Has been sick lately and her doctor told her to get plenty of fluids and plenty of rest! So now she drinks till she passes out.

Not every flower can say love, but roses can. Not very plant survives thirst, but a cactus can. Not every retard can read... but look at you having a go!

Facebook is like jail, you sit around waisting your time, changing your statues, and getting poked by people you dont know.

They call them the "Homeless" now....when i was a Kid they called them "Hobos" or "Bums"...........Next Year it will be "Outdoorsmen"......I think they should call them "Hygiene-Impaired Professional Squeegee Technicians."

On the Bus today i was sitting Across from a Really Beautiful Girl and I kept thinking to Myself, "Please don't get an Erection, Please don't get an Erection" ......................... but She Did.

I was just Washing my Hands in the Mens' Toilets, when I thought to Myself ....................."I should Probably be using the Sink."

The only thing I Hate worse than Holding her Purse ............... is when it Doesn't Match what I'm Wearing.

I can Tolerate Kids a lot better after some Alcohol .................... seriously, they are Way more Amusing once you get a Couple Beers in them.

Since it Started Snowing all the Girlfriend has done is Look through the Window .............. i guess it's Time I let her Indoors.

I think the Hardest part of Watching a Woman Change Clothes ............... is trying to Balance yourself on the Tree Branch with only One Free Hand.

The Chinese government has released their own verson of Facebook, it's called the Yellow Pages!!

Humans and Dolphins are the Only Mammals that have Sex for Pleasure ....................... which Explains why i have been Banned from Sea World.

I just Invented a Machine Gun that shoots Pennies .................... now She will see that i am not the Only One Afraid of Change!

Was walking Home with my Blond Friend last night and i said, "OMG look at that Dog with One Eye" She immediately put her Hand over her Eye and said, "Where, Where?"....

If you were Stranded on a Desert Island with only 1 Twilight Movie ............................. how would you Kill Yourself?

I made a Chicken Salad for Lunch ........................ little Peckerwood didn't even Eat It.

The Most Beautiful things in this World can not be Seen or Touched ................ at least according to this Stupid Restraining Order.

Motivation alone is not enough. If you have an idiot and you motivate him, now you have a motivated idiot.

Do you ever just look at Someone and "Why" is the only Thing you can come Up With?

Those Prudes in the Nudist Colonies need to take some Notes from the Girls in the Leper Colonies ....................... Over there, EVERYTHING comes off.

Everybody loves Pot Brownies ................... so i bring Crystal Meth Cupcakes and suddenly i'm the Weirdo?

My Doctor said the signs of an Allergic reaction are Getting Flushed, Breaking out in a Sweat, Heart starts beating rapidly and you find it really Hard to Breathe ............ well, so much for Exercise then.

My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.

Be nice to the people who smoke. Every cigarette may be their last.

I am a bomb technician. If you see me running, try to keep up.

Statistically speaking, around 165% of people exaggerate.

Statistically speaking, 8/6 people have trouble computing fractions.

Why can't chickens cross the road without their motives being questioned.

Good morning.... I see the assassins have failed.

If you must be taken for a ride, it may as well be in a good car.

Used to be schizophrenic. But now both of us are fine.

I’m everything you're not.

I let the dogs out.

Issha vingtrou blewi thth espaceb ar.

Would rather check his Facebook, than face his checkbook.

Just got a grip of reality, and is choking it to death.

Is not spoiled. Is not, is not is not!!!!

Is swearing to drunk that he is not God.

Is making some changes to his life. Leave a message, and if I don't get back to you later, you're one of the changes.

Bigamy - One wife too many. Monogamy - Same thing.

If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

Why won't you understand me like my iPhone does?

I woke up on the wrong side of Facebook this morning.

Why is the newspaper far more interesting when someone else is reading it?

We can all keep secrets. But the people we tell are not very good at it.

My girlfriend must have had 61 boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second over.

rejecting your reality and replacing it with his own.

Be nice to nerds. Chances are, you will be working for them.

Is experiencing life at the rate of several wtf's a minute.

My wife said I'm too immature, and if I don't grow up it's going to erect a barrier between us. Ha ha ha ha, erect.

People living in stone houses, should not throw glasses.

TEIAM - problem solved.

Never questions authority, he annoys authority. More effect, less effort.

Progress is made by lazy men looking for an easier way to do things.

The trouble with suggestions is that they often come from other people.

Oh Lord, give me patience, and GIVE IT TO ME NOW.

Today, so far you have failed to impress me. I am, however, willing to remain open minded.

I always give waiters a tip, but they never seem to appreciate my advice.

Some days... You just don't have enough middle fingers... ya know?

..... has a theory that the world would be a safer place if everyone were forced to take IQ tests and had to display their results as warnings to the population.

Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

People say that things happen for a reason. So when I hit you up side the head, remember I had a reason.

….feels like getting some work done...and so he is sitting down until the feeling passes.

….used to play sports. Then she realized you can buy trophies. Now she's good at everything.

...Has advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN


I resolve to work with neglected children. (my own).

...is color blind and trying to solve a Rubik's cube... This could take a while...

Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and your first reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor?

Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial muscles.

I hear there is scientific proof that birthdays are good for you... the more you have the longer you live.

I've always wondered if film directors wake up screaming "CUT! CUT! CUUUUUT!" when they have nightmares.

Top Tip Of The Week: When going through airport customs and you are asked "do you have any firearms with you?" do not reply "what do you need?"

….is a disaster waiting to happen

In 1962, six year old John Tuohy, his two brothers and two sisters entered Connecticut’s foster care system and were prompltyl spilit apart. Over the next ten years, John would live in more then ten foster homes, group homes and state schools, from his native Waterbury to Ansonia, New Haven, West Haven, Deep River and Hartford. In the end, a decade later, the state returned him to the same home and the same parents they had taken him from. As tragic as is funny complelling story will make you cry and laugh as you journey with this child to overcome the obsticales of the foster care system and find his dreams.


John William Tuohy is a writer who lives in Washington DC. He holds an MFA in writing from Lindenwood University. He is the author of numerous non-fiction on the history of organized crime including the ground break biography of bootlegger Roger Tuohy "When Capone's Mob Murdered Touhy" and "Guns and Glamour: A History of Organized Crime in Chicago."

His non-fiction crime short stories have appeared in The New Criminologist, American Mafia and other publications. John won the City of Chicago's Celtic Playfest for his work The Hannigan's of Beverly, and his short story fiction work, Karma Finds Franny Glass, appeared in AdmitTwo Magazine in October of 2008.

His play, Cyberdate.Com, was chosen for a public performance at the Actors Chapel in Manhattan in February of 2007 as part of the groups Reading Series for New York project. In June of 2008, the play won the Virginia Theater of The First Amendment Award for best new play. 

Contact John:


Architecture for the blog of it

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Sculpture this and Sculpture that

The art of War (Propaganda art through the ages)

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Admit it, you want to Read this Book (The art of Pulp Fiction covers)

The Godfather Trilogy BlogSpot

On the Waterfront: The Making of a great American Film

Absolutely blogalicious

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In Praise of the Rhode Island Wiener (New England foods)

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Old New England Recipes (New England foods)

Foster Care new and Updates

Aging out of the system

Murder, Death and Abuse in the Foster Care system

Angel and Saints in the Foster Care System

The Foster Children’s Blogs

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The Foster Children’s Bill of Right

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The Adventures of Foster Kid.

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The Quotable Helen Keller

Teddy Roosevelt's Letters to his children (Book support site)

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Whatever you do, don't laugh

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Following Fitzgerald


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Old New England Recipes

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And I Love Clams

In Praise of the Rhode Island Wiener

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Year One, 1955

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The Russian Mafia

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We Only Kill Each Other

Early Gangsters of New York City

Al Capone: Biography of a self-made Man

The Life and World of Al Capone

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Recipes we would Die For

The Prohibition in Pictures

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The Mob in Vegas

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Roger Touhy Gangster

Chicago’s Mob Bosses

Chicago Gang Land: It Happened Here

Whacked: One Hundred years of Murder in Gangland

The Mob Across America

Mob Cops, Lawyers and Front Men

Shooting the Mob: Dutch Schultz

Bugsy& His Flamingo: The Testimony of Virginia Hill

After Valachi. Hearings before the US Senate on Organized Crime

Mob Buster: Report of Special Agent Virgil Peterson to the Kefauver Committee (Book support site)

The US Government’s Timeline of Organized Crime (Book support site)

The Kefauver Organized Crime Hearings (Book support site)

Joe Valachi's testimony on the Mafia (Book support site)

Mobsters in the News

Shooting the Mob: Dead Mobsters (Book support site)

The Stolen Years Full Text (Roger Touhy)

Mobsters in Black and White

Mafia Gangsters, Wiseguys and Goodfellas

Whacked: One Hundred Years of Murder and Mayhem in the Chicago Mob (Book support site)

Gangland Gaslight: The Killing of Rosy Rosenthal (Book support site)

The Best of the Mob Files Series (Book support site)

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