John William Tuohy lives in Washington DC

Go ahead, laugh at that!

A duck walks into a drug store and gets some chap stick

The clerk asks “Will that be cash or charge?”

The duck says “Put it on my bill”

A father takes his son out to lunch. The waitress comes over and the father asks “What would you like son?”

The boy answers “A God damn hamburger” and the father clips him behind the ear.

The waitress waits a second and says “Little boy what you like to order?” and the boys says “You can beat your ass it won’t be

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