These days
Lifting myself up
Like a heavy weight,
Old camel getting to her knees,
I think of my mother
And the inexhaustible flame
That kept her alive
Until she died.
She knew all about fatigue
And how one pushes it aside
For staking up the lilies
Early in the morning,
The way one pushes it aside
For a friend in need,
For a hungry cat.
Mother, be with me.
Today on your birthday
I am older than you were
When you died
Thirty-five years ago.
Thinking of you
The old camel gets to her knees,
Stands up,
Moves forward slowly
Into the new day.
If you taught me one thing
It was never to fail life.
May Sarton is the pen name of
Eleanore Marie Sarton (May 3, 1912 – July 16, 1995), a prolific poet novelist
and memoirist. She is considered an important contemporary figure in American
literature, as well as a "poet's poet", and is lauded by literary and
feminist critics for her works addressing themes in gender, sexuality, and
universality.
Sarton wrote 53 books, including
19 novels, 17 books of poetry, 15 nonfiction works, 2 children's books, a play,
and additional screenplays. According to The Poetry Foundation, Sarton's style
as defined by critics is "calm, cultured, and urbane.”
In much of her writing, Sarton
maintains a politically conscious lens, but what is considered May Sarton's
best and most enduring work lies in her journals and memoirs, particularly
Plant Dreaming Deep (about her early years at Nelson, ca. 1958-68), Journal of
a Solitude (1972-1973, often considered her best), The House by the Sea
(1974-1976), Recovering (1978-1979) and At Seventy (1982-1983).
In these fragile, rambling and honest accounts
of her solitary life, she deals with such issues as aging, isolation, solitude,
friendship, love and relationships, lesbianism, self-doubt, success and
failure, envy, gratitude for life's simple pleasures, love of nature
(particularly of flowers), the changing seasons, spirituality and, importantly,
the constant struggles of a creative life. Sarton's later journals are not of
the same quality, as she endeavored to keep writing through ill health and by
dictation.
Although many of her earlier works,
such as Encounter in April, contain vivid erotic female imagery, May Sarton
often emphasized in her journals that she didn't see herself as a
"lesbian" writer: "The vision of life in my work is not limited
to one segment of humanity...and has little to do with sexual proclivity"
Rather she wanted to touch on
what is universally human about love in all its manifestations. When publishing
her novel Mrs. Stevens Hears the Mermaids Singing in 1965, she feared that
writing openly about lesbianism would lead to a diminution of the previously
established value of her work. "The fear of homosexuality is so great that
it took courage to write Mrs. Stevens Hears the Mermaids Singing," she
wrote in Journal of a Solitude, "to write a novel about a woman homosexual
who is not a sex maniac, a drunkard, a drug-taker, or in any way repulsive, to
portray a homosexual who is neither pitiable nor disgusting, without
sentimentality ..."
After the book's release, many of
Sarton's works began to be studied in university level women's studies classes,
being embraced by feminists and lesbians alike. However, Sarton's work should
not be classified as 'lesbian literature' alone, as her works develop many
deeply human issues of love, loneliness, aging, nature, self-doubt etc., common
to both men and women.
Margot Peters' controversial
biography (1998) revealed May Sarton as a complex individual who often
struggled in her relationships.